Chris Fralic’s 7 rules for making memorable connections

Edited excerpt from How to Become Insanely Well-Connected by Chris Fralic:

1. Convey genuine appreciation — think about what they know that you don’t.
2. Listen with intent — demonstrate you’ve heard exactly what was said by the other person, and encourage them to continue.
3. Use humility markers — acknowledge your own fallibility and imperfection so you’re relatable; act in a way that implies your time is no more important than theirs.
4. Offer unvarnished honesty — in what will actually have utility for the other party.
5. Blue-sky brainstorm — with them, not for them.
6. End every meeting or conversation with the feeling and optimism you’d like to have at the start of your next conversation with the person.
7. Don’t fake it — know exactly why you care about that person or their company, based on diligent preparation.

Notes:
(1) According to Chris, the over-arching principle is: Imparting energy is more important than sharing new information.
(2) Perhaps this advice applies to all relationships, not just business connections.
(3) Note Chris’ advice about how to listen with intent — “demonstrate you’ve heard exactly what was said by the other person, and encourage them to continue”. Cf. How to be a better listener.

2 thoughts on “Chris Fralic’s 7 rules for making memorable connections

    • Yes, good point, Bill — and thank you for the link. Interesting to note the differences. Dale Carnegie’s non-overlaps include: “Don’t criticize, condemn, or complain”; “Arouse in the other person an eager want”; and “Remember that a person’s name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language”.

      And Chris Fralic’s non-overlaps include: “Use humility markers — acknowledge your own fallibility and imperfection so you’re relatable; act in a way that implies your time is no more important than theirs.”

      Dale Carnegie’s “Talk in terms of the other person’s interests” might be close to Chris Fralic’s “Blue-sky brainstorm — with them, not for them”. And his “Smile” might be close to Chris Fralic’s “End every meeting or conversation with the feeling and optimism you’d like to have at the start of your next conversation with the person”.

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